Daily thoughts

I stop and think..
just about every day, about living alone..
I can't help it I guess since it's just pretty much in my face..
And I think back over the course of the last year, what could have been done
differently..on both our parts..
He could have been more honest from the beginning..
If he had I don't think I would be in the spot that I'm in right now.
Had I known he was married,
we wouldn't have ever even gone on the first date.
Not one..
I'm not saying i'm with out fault,
But all I asked for was honesty.

And all I got was a heartache.

Now of course, he wants to be that honest person
now that he lives in another state..
and has straightened out his life I guess.
Now he WANTS to marry me..
where was that 8 years ago???
Now he wants to live out HIS dream in another state..
it's not my dream tho..
why did it have to become such a nightmare for me
for him to have his dream.
I have to be low on sodium
for all the tears that have flowed over this man.